What Has Love and Attitudes Got To Do With It?

The Love Chapter

1Corinthians 13:4-8

Love is patient, love is kind.  It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud, it is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.  Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.  Love never fails.

 

Love is patient - When am I not?  In what type of situations do I have less patients?  When am I most patient?      
                                                       

Love does not envy - Do I envy at times?   If so, what or who, do I likely envy?                                         

Love does not boast - Do I boast at times?  If so, in what ways?                                         

Love is not proud -  Do I have a prideful attitude rather than a humble one?  In what ways?                                            

Love is not rude - Have I been carelessly, unintentionally, or unknowingly rude at times? In what ways?

Love is not self-seeking - In what ways am I more self-seeking? 

Love is not easily angered - What type of things, attitudes/behaviors, or situations easily anger you?  How do you deal with this? How quickly do you deal with it? Do you hold on to it for a period of time because you feel justified in it? How long before you cry out to God and fill Him in on your feelings, surrender the situation and feelings to Him, and listen to what He will impress on your heart?

Love keeps no record of wrongs - Do I bring up past history (things forgiven) when in a heated discussion? Do I attack the issue at hand, or the persons character? Am I able to still keep a forgiving spirit even though I may not feel it strongly until things have settled. How would Jesus want me to handle this? Is Jesus pleased with the way I am handling it?

Love does not delight in evil -  Do I delight in anything that I know will not please God?

Love rejoices with the truth - The truth always leaves one with a clear conscience and pleases Jesus.

Love always protects - In what ways does a parent protect their children? How does God similarly protect us?  In what ways does a parent discipline children?  How are God's ways similar when He disciplines us?  Why do you discipline and protect your children? Why does God discipline or protect His children?
 

Love always trusts -  We should always trust God, but especially with those we don't know well, even if we have casually known them for many years, use wisdom, and trust in increments as you learn to know them better.  People are fallible, God is infallible. 

Love always hopes - The only hope that is anchored and sure, is in Christ Jesus and His Word.

Love always perseveres - God provides tests and trials for His children to build their Christ-like character and to strengthen their faith as they look to Him, and rely on Him to bring them through. He also uses them to reveal to us what is really deep in our hearts so that we can surrender those things to Him. No matter how great the test or trial we must continue trusting and relying on God. Even though we don't have the answers we want and cannot understand the why's, when we know God's character and love, we know we can trust He knows what is best from an eternal perspective, and He will work all things out for good from His perfect perspective. He is the only One who knows the end from the beginning and all the details in between, and how to bring things together at the proper times.

Love never fails -  We may experience different types of failure in life, but God's love never fails. There is nothing or anyone who can take His love from us.  It is unconditional.  He wants us to practice unconditional love for others. This doesn't mean we condone wrongdoing, only that we will not stop caring for the person even though we may hate their behavior. We are to pray for those who wrong or hurt us, that God will work in their hearts to desire after Him.

 

At different times in our lives, and under different circumstances, and experiences, we will be tested in different areas of our life.  We know that God doesn’t need to test us, or allow us to be tested so that He will know how we will handle each situation.  God allows it so that we can see ourselves, as we really are, in our inner being.   He knows that we cannot see our faults as clearly as another can see them, just as we are able to see faults in others that they probably aren’t aware of.  Often we are not aware of some behaviors or attitudes until someone, usually a loved one, enlighten us.  This can be painful, but we can use the knowledge to ask God to help us change this attitude.   I say attitude, not behavior, because the behavior stems from the attitude.  This will take time, and lots of practice, probably with some slips, before you own the new attitude.
 

I have had some bad experiences over the past few years that were planned out by another to cause me a lot of stress, but it caused more anger than anything.   I found out I had been lied to and deceived when I was most vulnerable, at the time my husband died and I was deep in grief and my mind in a fog.  I had been trusting the manager of my building to be giving me correct information and believing she was telling me the truth.  She had been purposely giving me wrong information and withholding information I needed.I found out eleven months later that I had been set up to lose my rent subsidy and not being able to pay market rent, I would have been evicted. I had no choice but to report the situation to Housing as the manager of my building had another person who worked in the applications department helping her. Therefore, I did not lose my subsidy.  I thought I had forgiven the people involved and had even been praying for their salvation.  Because the harassment has been ongoing in intervals, I have found myself feeling angry again.  In between episodes, I would be rehashing why I was feeling angry and what would God want me to do?   I could have made it a legal matter, and still could, but is that what God wants?  I do not know.  Since I don’t know, I will keep praying for them, but also for myself concerning my attitudes. 

I have been examining my heart and realized that I have been too focused on them and the pain they have been causing, instead of focusing more on God and leaving them in His hands.   I need to let go of the record of wrongs and start seeing them as if they were my sisters and brothers that I love.  I need to see them through the eyes and heart of Christ Jesus.  I need to realize I cannot change their attitudes but I can have mine renewed.  Only God can change a heart.  I need to pray that way for them.   I want to keep my focus on Jesus by being rooted in His Word and reliant on His Spirit to direct and enable me to honor Christ Jesus in my attitudes, words, and behavior.  I need to keep uppermost in my mind that I represent Christ Jesus to all I meet, just as every Christian does.  How would my attitude compare to Jesus' attitude?

As life would have it, even when we think we have things under control and we are doing alright in our own minds, in rolls another test or trial to keep us in the transformation stage as we both grow in faith… and have another attitude or two renewed.

We could really dig into each of these attitudes above and get a lot out of them as we discover they pop up in our lives when we least expect them.  It is when we discover them in ourselves that we seriously need God’s help to root them out and replace them with a new Christ like attitude.  If the old attitude is just removed, and not replaced, it will slip back pretty fast.
 

Do you think there are a couple or even a few attitudes you would like to turn over to God and replace them with a Christ like one?  

Which ones do you find popping up the most in your life at this time?

What is the trigger most of the time?   Which people or situations in your life seem to trigger unwanted attitudes?  Why?   

Sometimes we may think we have dealt with anger or another negative emotion when it is still lurking in the deepness of our soul.  We may need to take it to God on more than one occasion to deal with it.   Psalms 62 tells us to pour out our hearts to God… when we are in a deep emotional state, whether anger, confusion, or grief, or other emotion, and are totally honest with God about our feelings, the good, the bad, and the ugly, He hears us.    Pause and listen and you will find His thoughts coming into mind (His thoughts will always agree with His Word and will never contradict any biblical principles). and you will know what He wants you to do in order to heal, and in order to forgive others so that you will be able  to begin letting go of the anger.  When the anger resurfaces, take it back to Him, reminding Him that you have chosen to forgive so you need Him to help you feel it.  It has been at these pouring out times that I have felt closest to God. 
 

Do others feel like they are always in one struggle or another in the attitude department?  Do you feel like even when you are practicing a new attitude that things happen that will challenge you on it?  Well, I guess God just wants us to practice using the new attitude,  and the only way that is going to happen is if it is tested enough times until it gets deeply rooted in. ;)

I hope I will hear from some of you, even if you want to remain anonymous, that's ok.  I would like to hear how others are dealing with attitudes, and maybe they can encourage others with the way they  handle their particular situations. 

  There is always an attitude to work on and sometimes it may be one we were previously working on. The important thing is that we recognize wrong attitudes and desire to replace them with godly ones.  The only way to do that is to surrender that area to God and practice another godly attitude in its place.  This is how the Holy Spirit takes the Word of God and transforms our heart attitudes so that we will progressively become more and more Christ-like in both character, love, and be living out what God has already put in, through Christ Jesus.  He supplies the power through His Word and the Holy Spirit.  That way, we are doing it because of the right motive and out of love for Christ. He puts the desire to honor Him in all we do and say, so it is a joy to work this out in our lives. We must remember we are not under the law; we are under grace, and He has given us more than enough to do everything we need to do with joy for His honor.

~Annie`